"Eat Your School" - A Check In

Stats:

Height 5"4'
Weight 146.6 (-0.3)

BMI 25.2 (Overweight...by 1 pound...Doh!)
Dress Size: 10/12

Bust  33 in

Waist 31 in (-1)

Hips 38 in

Despite the slight loss and getting my waist back to its "mostly normal" measurement of 31, last week was kind of rough.  I made a pretty good effort to exercise my butt off but I also couldn't seem to control the urge to eat anything that didn't eat me first.  I put this cute-sy little picture above on this post because that is about how my logic feels lately.  Like I really would "eat a school", like I'm somehow using food as a drug again ('cause I certainly am), and I definitely have slacked off on the veggies!  It's like I've almost given myself back over to the addiction and I've been struggling with that for two months now.

And since the start of this week that has not improved.  I seem to have no control at all again and I'm not sure if I need another silly contest to motivate me, deep spiritual work, or... what?  I've been seriously practicing the whole "lifestyle change" for 6 months now.  In that time I've lost 15-19 pounds (I've been fluctuating up and down those last four pounds in these last two months).  A select few people I've heard about started this around the same time I did and they've lost about 40 pounds or so while I've been stuck.  Part of this is that I've been dealing with a crisis involving ugly court issues with my oldest child's father, but mostly its like I've just lost my motivation.  I don't know what to do just yet to get it back, but I do know I can't keep going this direction.

This week promises to be even more of a challenge.  I overate (beyond overate, actually) Sunday and Monday, and Wednesday is my birthday (which means a big dinner out and probably cake even though I have insisted on none).  What I especially seemed to be craving last week (and still am this week) was salt, salt, salt, and more salt.  I read recently if salt is what you crave then what your body is lacking is chloride and that you should eat stuff like goats milk, fish or unrefined sea salt.  I can't handle goat's milk and don't even know what unrefined sea salt is.  I do enjoy fish though, but it is almost never immediately available to me.  I wonder if cans of tuna would qualify?